Embracing the orphan at home

On page 35 of the Jan. 21 issue, Thorpe wrote “Advocating for the orphan” about international adoption. Now she looks at local adoption, and the story of a young couple who adopted two children.

The cry of Christ is to love his people. The example he sets is unquestionable. He embraces those who are rejected by the world, setting a standard meant to be followed. Christians are taught to do as Christ did, to love those who are not loved, to embrace the orphan.

This gospel is meant to transform lives. For Shaleen and Cody Martens, members of Bergthaler Mennonite Church, Grunthal, Sask., it has. Shortly after being married, the Martens, now 23, let their lives be transformed by the conviction to adopt two young Métis brothers from Saskatoon. They are adamant that God prompted the adoption and created the circumstances for it to happen.

When the Martens first met their sons, Seth, 7, and Dillon, 4, they were being fostered by Cody’s parents. As Shaleen did homecare work with them, both Shaleen and Cody got to know the children. Seth was even the ring bearer at their wedding. In retrospect, Shaleen says it was clear that God had a plan for Seth and Dillon to be in their lives.

The couple were adjusting to the newness of married life, new jobs and a home under construction, when God began to call them to adoption.

“Looking back now, I can’t believe how selfishly we thought,” Shaleen says. “For me, it is hard to reflect on where I was at and believe that God looked at me and said, ‘I’m gonna use you.’ But He did.”

God’s call to the Martens required growth and sacrifice. Cody recognizes that he was able to embrace the calling to adopt because he knew it was God’s will for them. Today he says that, “despite the difficulties of parenting and a very different lifestyle, I feel very blessed.

For Shaleen, God first revealed his plan a month after they were married. Reading her Bible, she says she heard a still small voice speak, something she had never experienced before, saying “I want you to adopt Seth and Dillon.”

“My prayer was this,” Shaleen shares, “God, I think this is bananas! Crazy! It will never work! But I love you, and I know with you all things are possible. You can do anything! I will obey you.”

She then asked God for two things: further confirmation of his will, and that God would reveal this to Cody without her. Two days later, Cody approached Shaleen with the same message on his heart.

Three years after Shaleen and Cody became parents to Seth and Dillon, they welcomed their first biological child, Beau. Both Seth and Dillon love their new brother dearly.

When originally sharing the adoption plans with their community, many people were in shock, thinking them too young. Some people close to the couple were supportive, but there were many responses that were discouraging. The Martens say that through the difficulties, the support and encouragement of their family and friends means the world.

Challenges did occur in the adoption process. Waiting, paperwork, transitions in lifestyle, emotional issues of children being uprooted to a new family, children being dismissed by some because they are not biological—these parts of the process were heart-wrenching, but not always shared with their community.

Despite the challenges, there have been moments that tell these young parents they are doing God’s will. Moments of cuddles and giggles, realizing these two brothers get to grow up together, watching their children grow spiritually, hearing Seth talk about having a family one day that will adopt kids, too. Those moments are reminders that God blesses obedience and embraces those who embrace the orphans.

Cody and Shaleen’s obedience has begun a legacy that will influence generations. They have given their children a standard of faith to grow into, and have demonstrated that to follow Christ your life must reflect his calling. They are examples to the church that orphans are among us, and must be loved. Their very lives declare that to love the unloved requires sacrifice and new definitions of family.

The Martens have embraced this new sense of family, revealing that it isn’t about genetics, it is about love. The love they speak of influences their children. Recently, when Seth saw pictures of children that were poor and hungry, he told his parents, “We should go get them and bring them home. We have two extra chairs at our table.”

This child of adoption has grasped something that the church does not always: God really cares about his children and wants the church to be his hands and feet, the ones who take care of orphans.

Brandi J. Thorpe, a blogger for Young Voices, is residing for a season in Kitchener, Ont.